there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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