Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
