How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
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