If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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