What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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