Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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