Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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