when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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