She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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