and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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