Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Randomize
