I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
i need some magic done to my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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