no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
