Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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