Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
