You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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