Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
