if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize
