Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
