Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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