i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
