let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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