just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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