i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n