Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
