I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
