I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
