it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
