I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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