so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
