Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize