Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize