I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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