you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
