Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
