I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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