Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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