real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Randomize
