I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
