No awkward lesbian experiences without me
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Boobs speak an international language.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
