Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
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I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
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