Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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