gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
