How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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