Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I think I have vodka in my lungs
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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