we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
