So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
