I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
two words: eviction party
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
