I want to stick my p in your. b.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
i need some magic done to my vagina
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
