We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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